Being Shy
Susan Cain was a shy girl. She felt very uncomfortable in social situations. When she met new people she felt her heart beat faster. Like many shy people, Susan did not want other people looking at her. She liked to be quiet and watch other people.
One of the first things you’ll notice when learning a language is the speed at which natives speak. Even if you understand words written on the page, when you hear them spoken at full speed by a native speaker you can feel like you’re listening to a confusing collection of random sounds.
Audio
Transcript
Voice 1
Welcome to Spotlight. I’m Liz Waid.
Voice 2
And I’m Colin Lowther. Spotlight uses a special English method of broadcasting. It is easier for people to understand, no matter where in the world they live.
Voice 1
Susan Cain was a shy girl. She felt very uncomfortable in social situations. When she met new people she felt her heart beat faster. Like many shy people, Susan did not want other people looking at her. She liked to be quiet and watch other people.
Voice 2
But when she grew up Susan chose a surprising job. She became a lawyer. This is usually a job for a bold person who likes to talk in front of people – not a shy person like Susan. But Susan Cain thinks that her shyness made her a better lawyer. She told the news organization NPR:
Voice 3
“At first I had the idea that I would be disadvantaged. You know, that a powerful lawyer had to be very bold. But I quickly found that that was completely not true. There was a very different group of skills that you could bring with you. These would also make you very powerful. You know, like listening carefully to people and asking questions. And building relationships with people. You are not so comfortable in groups? Fine, you can do it alone with one other person. That can be much better.”
Voice 1
Susan Cain thinks that being shy can be good! She even wrote a book about being shy. Today’s Spotlight is on being shy.
Voice 2
The Shyness Institute reports that almost half of all people say that they are shy. Social scientists studied young adults in eight countries across the world. They found differences between the countries. In Japan, 57% of people said that they were shy. The lowest number of shy people was in Israel - only 31%. In most countries, about 40% of the population said that they were shy.
Voice 1
There are many levels of shyness. For example, some people are not shy when they are with their friends. But when they are in a new social situation, they become afraid.
Voice 2
For other people, shyness can be a mental problem. In social situations, they become so worried that they cannot speak or act. This can stop people from performing well at work or in society. Dr. Liza Gold of Georgetown University Medical Centre told the news organization NPR about this serious shyness:
Voice 4
“It is a somewhat common problem. About 15% of the population have a mental condition of extreme social fear. Some have a disorder that makes them very afraid around other people. This is an extremely painful and limiting condition. It may interfere with how someone can work and produce and live.”
Voice 1
But why are some people shy? Scientists say that it is because of two things: genetic character and life experience.
Voice 2
Scientists at Harvard University in the United States did a study of two-month-old babies. They saw that the babies behaved differently from one another. Of every five babies, one was very active. This kind of baby was bold and liked to make noise. And one of every five babies was the opposite. This kind of baby was very quiet and sensitive. They did not like loud noise or bright light. These sensitive babies were likely to be shy as older children.
Voice 1
Experience also affects shyness. Some people become shy because of what has happened to them. For example, children who are overly criticized by their family can become shy. The Shyness Institute says that children who are shy usually have parents that have fewer friends and fewer family social activities.
Voice 2
But children with sensitive characters do not only have negative experiences. Good experiences can help sensitive children become more bold. They can even grow up to be adults who are not very shy.
Voice 1
Many cultures place a high value on being social. And people who are bold can be more successful socially. Shy people may feel that they are not as good as social people. Shy people may feel that they have a disadvantage in their social life and in their work.
Voice 2
But shyness can be an advantage. Many shy people have good characters and good skills. Shy people are often very good at listening. They are good friends because they listen more than they talk. Susan Cain is the shy woman who became a lawyer and writer. She explains how researchers have even seen these good qualities in shy children:
Voice 3
“Children who are shy also show stronger consciences. They are much less likely to cheat or lie - even when they think they cannot be caught. People form their consciences by being sensitive to disapproval. A sensitive child is forming a strong conscience early on. Studies show that these children are much more likely to show sympathy for others. This continues all the way through life. So when you look at these children when they grow up they have good characteristics like sympathy and honesty.”
Voice 1
But not all shy people are able to show these good characteristics. Professor Tony Kashdan of George Mason University explains to NPR:
Voice 6
“Some people with extreme shyness might have these good morals. They may be sympathetic or giving or thankful. But we find that these skills are often unused. The reason is that very shy people are so self-focused. They are very worried about making a mistake. They are so focused on whether someone else can see their fear. This makes it difficult to support other people.”
Voice 2
A shy person may not have a choice about being shy. She becomes shy because of her genetic character and her experience. But, she can learn to use the good skills that many shy people have. In this way she can do something good with her shy character.
Voice 1
Do you think there are advantages to being shy? What is your experience with shyness? Share your story on our website, or email us at radio@radioenglish.net.
Voice 2
The writer and producer of this program was Rena Dam. The voices you heard were from the United States and the United Kingdom. All quotes were adapted for this program and voiced by Spotlight. You can listen to this program again, and read it, on the internet at www.radioenglish.net. This program is called, ‘Being Shy’.
Voice 1
You can also find us on Facebook - just search for Spotlight Radio. We hope you can join us again for the next Spotlight program. Goodbye!
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